My heart hurts and it wont stop. There was a time, when I had the strongest prison gates around my heart and my mind. I was numb and that made me safe and I then had the capability to work, mother, and live. Then I met John and these bricks crumbled one by one as I began to trust a man again.  And now I want them back, but they are not there.  I cannot even muster up a single quartz of sand to build around my pain.  And this in turn begins a dominoe effect of fear that I cant stop the train.